Where Are The Feelings?

Since the Sunday after Hannah died I have had no great feelings of sadness. I feel numb. Often it doesn't even feel like I had a daughter. It's like Hannah is just a baby we met while on holidays. I'm actually more upset that I'm not grieving more & am just getting on with life. I don't want to forget her. Is this God giving us an unexplainable peace & strength? Is it because I have accepted that it was God's will? 

I really struggled in the immediate days after her death with questions of "did we do the right thing?", "was a mistake made by the drs?", "what if....?". The big one was "Why would God so obviously perform a miricle & bring her back to life, only to take her the next evening?". But the answer I believe He has given to me is that He was showing me & most likely the Dr that He was capable of doing it if it was His will, but it wasn't. I've accepted this & am at peace with it.